Embracing motherhooD
Alright, mamas, let’s get real for a moment. No matter the stage or age of your children, motherhood is CHALLENGING!
It’s a beautiful, chaotic, and joyful journey! Despite the abundance of information available, no two mothers parent in the same way. There hasn’t been a definitive guide created for us, which can sometimes lead us to wonder if we’re navigating this parenting adventure correctly.
There’s an overwhelming number of books available on how to be a better mom, how to prepare for motherhood, and the best ways to raise our little ones.
Raising children in today’s world is a total different landscape.
Parenting today is significantly different from what it was 15 years ago. Social media serves as both a blessing and a curse! With an overwhelming amount of information shared daily, it can be disheartening to compare yourself to others' “highlight reels” of seemingly perfect lives.
Remember:
You are doing your best.
You are nurturing your children in the best way you know how.
Each of us is unique in our approach.
What truly matters is ensuring that our children grow up in a loving and stable home environment, even if you are a single mama, or the co-parenting mama.
In the beginning I found myself struggling with the pressure to conform to the latest socially accepted parenting trends. I constantly criticized myself for not following the newest fads, whether it was feeding my kids organic food, breastfeeding my baby, or deciding whether to homeschool our not so little babies, anymore. The list goes on and on!
As a mom, I thought I knew the kind of parent I wanted to be… or at least I thought I did.
Life has a peculiar way of bringing us back to reality. As a young teenager, I envisioned the perfect family, the ideal marriage, and a blissful life—a classic Cinderella story. Don’t get me wrong; I absolutely LOVE my life and my family. However, it is FAR from perfect, and that imperfection is beautiful in its own right! As we grow and experience life, we often recognize what we desire or want to avoid for ourselves.
This is easier said than done, so let me elaborate.
I was a strong-willed teenager who rebelled against parental authority. I moved out at 18 and began living with my boyfriend, who is now my husband of 15 years. When I was 21 we tied the knot, and soon after, what was left but to start a family?
The Journey to Parenthood: A Personal Reflection
HA! I initially thought this would be a straightforward endeavor. Yes, let's have a baby! However, I hadn't fully considered the complexities of conceiving. I was aware of the basic concepts, of course, but I was quite naive—after all, I was still maturing myself, even at 22.
Thus, we began trying, and it felt like an eternity! I soon discovered that endometriosis could complicate conception. By June 2013, at 24 years old, I was about to learn that I was finally pregnant. It took us two long years, during which everyone around me was welcoming new babies. The emotional turmoil during that time was overwhelming; it can truly mess with your mind when you're striving for something so deeply yet facing obstacles. The first word that comes to mind to describe my feelings is jealousy. I desperately wanted this, and yet it eluded me. I couldn’t grasp the reasons behind it.
Looking back now, I understand it was all part of a greater plan. But for those who know me, patience is not my strong suit. I dislike relying on others, I struggle when I don't get my way, and I prefer to maintain control. This left me feeling powerless. It may sound childish, but yes, I threw myself a pity party.
In June 2013, after what seemed like an eternity of trying to conceive, I found myself four days late and decided it was time to take a pregnancy test.. I felt an overwhelming sense of hope. Since my husband was working out of town from Monday to Friday, I was home alone. Those three minutes of waiting to check the test felt like an eternity... more on “waiting” later. As soon as the timer beeped, I snatched the stick, and to my surprise, there were two faint pink lines. I was pregnant! I couldn't believe it, so I took three more tests to confirm. Each one lit up positive. Excited, I grabbed all the tests, jumped into my Jeep, and drove to Leadville, CO, where my husband was staying for work. We celebrated that night!
It was around two weeks later I called my doctor to schedule my first appointment. What should have been a joyous occasion quickly turned into a heartbreaking one. My blood was drawn to measure the pregnancy hormone levels, and the results were not what the doctors deemed “optimal” for a viable pregnancy. I was advised to prepare for a miscarriage. To add to the confusion, I was experiencing significant pregnancy symptoms: I felt nauseous all day, my breasts were incredibly sore, and my emotions were all over the place. This continued for three weeks after being told I might miscarry. I told my husband that I still felt pregnant, and I hadn’t experienced any bleeding or painful cramping.
We decided to return to the doctor for another blood draw. This time, the lab results were undeniable—my pregnancy was viable, and my baby was still with me. The emotions I experienced were surreal. I know many women and couples face fertility challenges for years, yet the pain of not conceiving is devastating at any stage. I had prayed hard and long for this little human. Here he was.
What is the intention behind my reflections?It’s quite straightforward. I encountered the uncertainty of pregnancy and felt isolated. Although I was not truly alone, I didn’t realize it at the time. In difficult times, I hadn’t sought God for hope, strength, or grace due to my bitterness. I couldn’t grasp His larger plan. However, reflecting on those moments, I now wish I had turned to Him and looked to the Bible for hope.
I want to be fully transparent: there are times when my faith is challenged and that bitterness resurfaces. However, amidst life’s unpredictability, choosing to embrace faith is often all that remains.
So in times of despair, I hope these Bible verses bring you solace.
Keep them handy—whether you write them down or take a screenshot—so that when you encounter seemingly insurmountable challenges and feel isolated, you can easily refer to them.
-Jess
